perception Archives - Page 3 of 14

November 26, 2022November 28, 2022 by Pete Wiley

Parts of a Whole—Understanding Who You Are

It’s the middle of the night, and you wake up as a different person. You’re still you, but part of you is missing. The part of you that is confident in your life and your path is missing, and what is left is a mess of doubts, fears, and worries, with maybe even a healthy dose of self-hatred. Why is it that there are times in our lives when we are happy, confident, and energetic and other times, maybe even the same day, when all of that seems stripped away, or replaced by its negative twin? It may happen when we can’t sleep in the middle of the night, or when we’re commuting, or when we’re alone for any length of time. It’s important to know why this happens and what we do when it does happen.

November 12, 2022November 10, 2022 by Pete Wiley

The Fluidity of Friendship—The Evolving Nature of Our Connections

The people you know are not the same people they were when you met.

People change—sometimes little by little, in subtle ways, and sometimes dramatically—but, ultimately, we all change all the time. We have to be open to changes in the people we know—even those we have known intimately or for a long time. If we expect people to stay the same, we will invariably be disappointed or confused. We also have to be open to changes within ourselves. If we find ourselves wondering why we aren’t reacting the same way to what is happening to us, it is because we are experiencing life as evolving, growing people. We constantly respond to the events in our lives in different ways, whether we know it or not. Once we embrace this fact, we will be able to handle life’s twists and turns with a sense of wonder and excitement instead of worry and foreboding.

October 29, 2022October 21, 2022 by Pete Wiley

Awestruck—How to Keep a Sense of Childlike Wonder

When we are children, so much of what we experience is new and exciting to us. Childlike wonder is a marvelous thing, and no other feeling is quite like it. It is excitement in the very heart of our being. Part of the feeling is due to the newness of childhood experiences—we’ve never previously considered them as a possibility. As we get older and have a range of experiences behind us, our ability to recapture that feeling falls off dramatically. We may still have new experiences, but they have familiar elements—they aren’t completely foreign to us. When we get to this point in our lives, we risk becoming jaded—not even being open to the kind of childlike wonder that we experienced in our youth. Can we keep the ability to find wonder in the world?

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October 15, 2022October 13, 2022 by Pete Wiley

I Am An Island—Who You Are When You’re Alone

I am truly fortunate to have a rich life, filled with people who are close to me, while still having a significant amount of independence. When my son was young, my situation was decidedly less flexible as our lives were inextricably intertwined, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. But now that he’s older, I have significantly more time that I can call my own. I miss my time with young Peter, but I love my time with old Pete. No one is free from a certain number of commitments and expectations. Without them, you would be hard-pressed to make a positive contribution in life, but balancing them with your lifestyle is key to living a life that is true to you. One way to address that balance is to find some dedicated time alone so that you can explore your desires, passions, and behavior, be with yourself, and be present for yourself.

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July 9, 2022July 5, 2022 by Pete Wiley

Past the Holy Grail—Looking Beyond That One Thing

I’ve had several times in my life during which I can only think about one thing. Everything else was relegated to brief attention when absolutely necessary. These “one things” included romantic interests, upcoming trips to new and interesting places, and life transitions. During these periods, my focus is unmatched, and my will is extremely strong. I find ways to mold reality into what I want it to be. I manipulate circumstances and people (mostly in positive ways) to ensure that my goals are achieved. These periods in life are exciting and truly meaningful, but they can also be fraught with anxiety, stress, and desperate longing. These are the moments when you feel most alive, existing with overwhelming intensity. However, during these times, you tend to lose perspective, as all that can be seen is the object of your attention. This state can make you highly effective, but it can also chip away at your mental and physical health. You seek your holy grail, and in your mind, it’s that one thing that can bring you happiness and fulfillment

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