Personal growth can happen in many ways, but it is difficult to attain in isolation. Growth often occurs when we challenge ourselves, remain open to other people’s ideas and values, and explore the edges of our own comfort zones. All of these paths have an internal component, but they also involve engagement with others. To benefit fully from these experiences, you must be intentional about both the inner work and the connections that help shape it.
Stress is, well, stressful. Everyone has it, but not everyone has it all the time. Stress, ironically, is a healthy thing, or it used to be. In the past, it kicked our fight-or-flight system into gear when we needed it. But modern humans tend toward a constant state of stress because we face persistent pressures, such as job insecurity, economic uncertainty, and political instability. This tendency keeps stress responses running constantly on high for many. So, what can we do about it? Is there a way to mitigate stress and curtail its effects on us?
Life never works out exactly how you envision it, and for the most part, that’s a good thing. It may not seem like it at the time, especially if something important is disrupted, but for most people, a break in routine is healthy. An interruption can allow you to take stock of where you are, to spend time with the people who are important to you, and to gain perspective on what is truly a priority for you. Planned breaks in routine, such as vacations, can also serve these purposes, but they tend to be hectic and require planning. An unanticipated break jumps outside of your normal routine and organizational approach, and “clears the decks” mentally and emotionally.
Bonds that develop between people are often strong and seemingly unshakable. We might have our ups and downs, but we are devoted to each other and committed to long-lasting friendships. But inevitably, situations arise in which you’re called to support one friend over another. You have to show where your loyalties lie, and often, the choice is far from clear. You have to search deep within and decide which choice is true to your values and vision and, to the extent possible, honors your relationships.
Some people lead solitary lives—some by choice, others not. Most of us desire a certain level of human contact in our lives. When we don’t have it, we experience a growing yearning, which can become quite urgent if our solitude goes on for too long. The forced solitude experienced by many during the pandemic[1] is resulting in many people feeling this sense of urgency and with no outlet. Days continue to stream by. They may have a periodic video call for work or with family, but ultimately, they’re alone, and they’ve been alone. When we’re faced with solitude, we look for opportunities for any human connection. A quick chat with a server at a restaurant, passing the time with a fellow shopper while standing in line, or some small talk in passing with a neighbor can all be lifelines when we’re feeling truly alone. But we can also feel overwhelmed when we are faced with too much interaction—we feel a need for some solitude. Like anything else in life, balance is key.