perception Archives - Page 2 of 14

August 19, 2023May 13, 2023 by Pete Wiley

A Fresh Start—Finding a Spark in the Everyday

Life can be inconsistent. Why do you sometimes feel like you’re buried in baggage and history, and sometimes you can move forward unfettered? The difference can be how interesting your work or life activities are. You may be involved in what you perceive to be cumbersome pursuits, while at other times your life can be interesting and exciting. Sometimes the difference is purely psychological. During the times you feel weighted down, you may feel there is no escape from the narrow tunnel you’re in. You may feel there are forces in play that keep your life in constant drudgery, and you aren’t able to defeat them. At other times, even when engaged in the same activities or tasks, you feel energized and invigorated. The work seems light and even fun. If you could figure out the difference between these two scenarios, would it be possible to always keep it fresh?

April 15, 2023March 30, 2023 by Pete Wiley

Understanding Intimidation—Why We Are Intimidated and How to Handle It

We all get intimidated from time to time, even the most confident among us. Sometimes we are intimidated for good reason, and the feelings of fear, anxiety, and apprehension are important survival tools. Other times, we are intimidated by bullies, and learning their psychology and motivations can help us to deal with those situations. But there are also times when we are intimidated by well-meaning people who, for some reason, scare us, make us nervous, or put us off our game. It is important to understand all of these sources of intimidation, where they come from, and why and how they affect us.

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April 1, 2023March 23, 2023 by Pete Wiley

Fitting It in or Filling the Hours—Our Perception of Time

I’ve spent most of my life with every moment spoken for. I’ve had to really work to make time for meditation, exercise, and other self-care activities. This was good. I chose that lifestyle, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. Most of the time I enjoyed being in the fray—I like the feeling of being part of something and working hard with like-minded people toward a shared goal. I like being an active part of my son’s life and spending my evenings and weekends coaching baseball. I enjoy my hobbies, thinking and writing about leading a meaningful life, playing music, reading, and wood sculpting, but all these together left no room for downtime.

Again, this was a choice (and one that I would make again), but I never expected or wanted it to last forever. I always envisioned a time when I would have more time—to reflect, to get more serious about my physical fitness and grace, to build a more solid awareness of the universe and my place in it, and to explore new challenges. This involved a significant change in the way I perceive time. Because time is something I’ve never had enough of, I’ve always treated it as a scarce commodity—something I have to be careful with. So, whenever I did something that took significant time, such as reflection or meditation, I used to get antsy—like I was wasting my time. It’s important to develop an awareness of how we perceive time so that our relationship with time is appropriate for our lifestyle and our experiences.

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March 18, 2023March 23, 2023 by Pete Wiley

Emotional Wisdom — Understanding Where Your Emotions Take You

Each of us has a constant stream of emotions, but how many of us are aware of that stream and fully understand where our emotions come from and how they affect our lives?

It’s easier for more extreme emotions. We might get excited and happy before we’re about to travel. This kind of emotion bubbles up inside us, and our awareness of it is unavoidable. The same can be said for extremely negative emotions, for example when we suffer the loss of a loved one. In these times, we would do anything to escape the pain we are feeling. It overwhelms us, and we aren’t able to think about anything else. Our full awareness is caught up in our painful emotional stream. But what about times when we don’t feel overwhelming emotions? What about our day-to-day emotional context and how it affects our outlook and actions? It is possible to be fully aware of these emotions too. It’s not only possible; it’s a necessary step in living our lives to the fullest. Our emotional context is a driver for every decision we make, every word we speak, and every action we take. If we can become fully aware of this layer of our psyche, we can live our lives more intentionally and purposefully, and if we can take the next step and develop insights into our emotional stream—if we can see how our emotions are likely to evolve—we can live with a keen sense of identity and direction.

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February 4, 2023February 3, 2023 by Pete Wiley

Pure Poison—Offloading the Toxicity in Your Life

Poisons are the people, things, or situations you know are bad for you, yet they remain in your life. You likely have some poison in your life—everyone has. You may be one of the lucky ones who can recognize those situations right away and take decisive action. Or, like me, you rationalized, denied, or had an uncontrollable urge to keep them in your life. Most of these toxic elements in your life have their upside. They made you feel good in some way—at least in the short term, and that good must be intensely good because it is compelling you to live with the extreme negative aspects or consequences. The good part also may be a “potential good” or just imagined—a carrot just out of reach that never comes closer. The fundamental question is, why do you keep these poisons in your life? Why do you subject yourself to their ravages?

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