Proactive Archives - Page 8 of 31

October 29, 2022October 21, 2022 by Pete Wiley

Awestruck—How to Keep a Sense of Childlike Wonder

When we are children, so much of what we experience is new and exciting to us. Childlike wonder is a marvelous thing, and no other feeling is quite like it. It is excitement in the very heart of our being. Part of the feeling is due to the newness of childhood experiences—we’ve never previously considered them as a possibility. As we get older and have a range of experiences behind us, our ability to recapture that feeling falls off dramatically. We may still have new experiences, but they have familiar elements—they aren’t completely foreign to us. When we get to this point in our lives, we risk becoming jaded—not even being open to the kind of childlike wonder that we experienced in our youth. Can we keep the ability to find wonder in the world?

October 15, 2022October 13, 2022 by Pete Wiley

I Am An Island—Who You Are When You’re Alone

I am truly fortunate to have a rich life, filled with people who are close to me, while still having a significant amount of independence. When my son was young, my situation was decidedly less flexible as our lives were inextricably intertwined, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. But now that he’s older, I have significantly more time that I can call my own. I miss my time with young Peter, but I love my time with old Pete. No one is free from a certain number of commitments and expectations. Without them, you would be hard-pressed to make a positive contribution in life, but balancing them with your lifestyle is key to living a life that is true to you. One way to address that balance is to find some dedicated time alone so that you can explore your desires, passions, and behavior, be with yourself, and be present for yourself.

in Mindful / Proactive 1 comments

October 1, 2022September 30, 2022 by Pete Wiley

Your Core Self—Values and What They Mean for Your Life

Who you are and how you engage with the world can be influenced by a variety of factors. These may include your needs, what you want to achieve, the influence of others, and your reactions to events. But the most significant driver of your identity and behavior should be your own values and worldview. For some, these might be, to some extent, influenced or even dictated by authority figures, e.g., parents, religion, or other individuals or groups with a creed or specific set of values that you have been expected to follow. However, it is important to live according to your own values and be true to yourself. Only by doing this can you live genuinely.

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September 3, 2022September 5, 2022 by Pete Wiley

Celebrating Milestones—A Time to Pause and Reflect

My family makes a big deal about birthdays. We decorate the house for my son’s birthday in July, and keep it decorated right through my wife’s birthday in mid-September (mine is in early September). Like many anniversaries, birthdays are just ways to count another year going by (and an opportunity to eat and drink well!). But milestones go beyond tracking time and having celebrations. For many, they have a deeper meaning. They honor an auspicious occasion and/or allow us to recognize the significance of others’ presence in our lives. They’re also great opportunities to take stock of our lives—where we’ve been and where we’re going. To me, milestones are important, and reflecting on them contributes significantly to giving my life meaning.

in Emotions / Proactive 0 comments

August 6, 2022August 4, 2022 by Pete Wiley

How to Be Friendly in a Divisive World (and Why)

It’s so hard to be nice these days.

And why would I want to be? People seem to be looking out for only themselves, and they’re nasty about it. Common courtesy seems to be rapidly disappearing from our interactions, and disagreements seem to quickly devolve into personal attacks. It’s us and them, and there can be no civility if we happen to be on the wrong side.

How can we be friendly in such an environment—and why would we want to be? The answer is both simple and complicated. We can always be friendly. If you’re a friendly person, you can (and should) continue to be friendly, even when it seems the world’s just not a friendly place. If you’re not a friendly person, you should try it out: It’s a pleasant way to live your life.

Maybe the harder question is why would you want to be friendly? Why would I want to be friendly to a group of people whose worldview is off kilter and who are so unfriendly to me? The answer to this one is a bit more complicated, but ultimately, the answer is because that is the only way we (society) will move beyond the divisiveness and begin to act civilized again. It’s the only way to turn the corner.

in Open Mind / Proactive 1 comments