Proactive Archives - Page 30 of 31

February 6, 2016January 19, 2016 by Pete Wiley

Worry

Everyone, from Alfred E. Newman on, seems to offer advice about how to handle worry. But at some point or another, we all do it.

Nobody makes a conscious choice to worry. It’s a very unpleasant feeling, and it generally doesn’t fix the problem. It can also rob us of our peace of mind.

Everyone worries, but by recognizing it for what it is and acknowledging the effect it has on us, we can minimize those effects. In my experience, once I recognize and accept a negative feeling, it brings it out into the light of day, and this somehow makes it less scary.

January 9, 2016December 13, 2015 by Pete Wiley

Negativity

What do we do when negativity rears its ugly head?

We can try to always be positive and optimistic, but we can’t control it when others are negative.

However, by categorizing others’ words or actions as negative, we necessarily attach our own judgments to them and actually contribute to those words or actions being negative. We feed their negativity.

But what about inconsiderate drivers, rude retail clerks, catty relatives, surly teenagers, arrogant coworkers (I could go on all day)? Aren’t these people’s words and actions inherently negative? Maybe, but it’s not that simple.

December 26, 2015December 13, 2015 by Pete Wiley

Accomplishments

What are you most proud of?

How much do you think about it?

There can be a tendency, especially as we get older, to believe that we’ve done our best work: We’ve run our fastest race; we’ve written our symphony; we’ve painted our masterpiece. We might go so far as to base our identities on our past accomplishments rather than on our current lives.

It is interesting to think of the periods in our lives when we were (or will be) on fire. When is our heyday? If we think it was in the past or will be well into the future, that’s a sign we’re not living our lives the way we could. Why can’t our heyday be right now?

in Mindful / Proactive 1 comments

November 28, 2015November 28, 2015 by Pete Wiley

Clutter

“Why do we have all this junk?!”

It’s a question I ask myself quite often.

We have a small house, and it doesn’t take much to make it look and feel cluttered.

Don’t get me wrong, I love our small house. It’s cozy. It has plenty of space to work and live. It promotes “togetherness” as a family. But, as I tell my overly generous mother-in-law, our house is “full.” It has “exceeded capacity.” It is, in a word, cluttered.

It’s not that we’re disorganized. It’s not that we have a bunch of stuff lying around that needs to be put away. Everything is away, there’s just too much of it.

in Emotions / Proactive 0 comments

October 31, 2015July 19, 2015 by Pete Wiley

Nothing

Every once in a while, a voice inside me says, “I’m done.” I’ve used up all my energy and concentration, and I need some downtime. I need to spend some quality time doing nothing.

All of us need downtime—some need less than others and some seem to need way more than others. Why is this? One of the reasons might be what people do when they’re doing nothing. Some people waste their time when they’re wasting their time; and end up needing more time to waste (stay with me here).

in Mindful / Proactive 0 comments