A good friend of mine died recently, and I was confused about how I handled it. It was a shock for sure, as his passing was unexpected. But then, because he wasn’t part of my day-to-day life, the feeling wore off quickly. I felt guilty that I was getting on with my life so fast. Death affects us in different ways and depends on a variety of factors, but it will always be a part of our lives. We all have to experience it; like anything else, it’s healthy to do it intentionally.
Change is a good thing. But, sheesh, enough already.
Last year, I retired from a job I held for 36 years and am devoting myself to Blocks of Life full-time. I’m still in the midst of that transition, but I’m barely making the top five in terms of the transitions around me. My wife is retiring next week, my mother is turning 90 (also next week), and my son recently began his first full-time job. Needless to say, parties abound, and I’m just trying to keep up. Transitions are the specific manifestations of an evolving life. Although they can cause anxiety and are not always thought of in a completely positive light, they should always be celebrated.
I don’t seem to get sick that much—not since the days of having a young child in the petri dish of daycare and elementary school. But when I do get sick, I try to listen to my body. It’s easy to become grumpy about the lost time and missing out on events and experiences. At the same time, it’s a unique opportunity to experience your mind-body-spirit in different (and challenging) circumstances. It can be similar for injuries. Yes, they can be painful, slow you down, and prevent you from engaging in certain activities. But they also force you to be more mindful and listen to your body.
God, they’re irritating!
Everyone has people in their lives who get under their skin. It might be what they say or how they say it. It might be a behavior or habit they have. But nobody goes through life without someone who just irritates the hell out of them. But what can you do? Well, you do have choices. You can engage on their level or take the bait. You can be passive-aggressive regarding their behavior. You can also cut them out of your lives. But at the end of the day, people will be who they are, so you need to decide if you still want them in your life, and if so, you have to accept who they are.
Each of us has elements in our lives that are so precious to us that it’s hard to come to terms with their loss. You might not want to envision life without them—it’s unthinkable. But at the same time, nothing in our lives is permanent. These two competing ideas can be hard to reconcile. What is important to you may be a child, a relationship, or security as a family. There are some things that you don’t want to ever see threatened or come to an end. But as we each have to face death, we also have to face the fact that nothing at all is going to last forever.