Gratitude. Young woman in a field feeling grateful.

How to Recognize the Good Stuff—Keeping Gratitude in Our Lives

“Thank you!” 

Such a simple thing to say (or think), but it’s so important.

Having gratitude in our lives results in a range of benefits—both individually and from the perspective of society. The act of acknowledging the good things in our lives, and the fact that we are grateful for them, adds meaning to our lives in many ways. It allows us to keep a healthy perspective when we might have otherwise wallowed in our negative emotions and our interpretations of the unfortunate or unfair aspects of our lives.

A sense of gratitude helps us to interact with others in a healthy way. It helps us avoid a “me first” attitude or a sense of entitlement by acknowledging the source of our good fortune, happy feelings, meaning, and fulfillment. 

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High Angle view of two people sharing opinions over coffee.

It’s Not All About You—Allowing for Different Opinions

Having a meaningful life involves caring deeply about our passions and perspectives. The causes we work toward and the effort we put in toward our goals can define who we are. These thoughts and actions are aligned with our values and consistent with our worldview, and it can become very hard to hear anything that goes against them.

When our causes or our work become part of our identity or the basis for how we interact with people, it can be all too easy to take ourselves too seriously and not be open-minded to others’ perspectives and opinions. We want everyone to agree with us and be supportive of what we are trying to achieve, but of course it doesn’t always work that way.

When we go through life with the expectation that everyone we come across should be as passionate as we are, care about the same things we care about, and be interested in everything we have to say, not only will we be disappointed, but we will also come across as arrogant or a know-it-all.

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Pieces. Man hiking on crossroads at sunset in countryside

Pieces of Life—Choosing your own Path

When it comes down to it, life is an exercise in putting together a multitude of components that are part of, or could be part of, our lives. We are constantly trying to piece together the right elements in the right combination to be happy, to make a living, to raise our families, and to become the people we want to be.

I’ve always thought of these as “blocks of life.” We can think of the fundamental blocks that make up our lives—family, job, friends, activities, and outlook—but when we think about what each of these is made of, we find that there are an enormous number of components and potential components that we might incorporate into our lives and many ways that we can organize them that would give our lives different emphases.

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Overcoming Fear. Woman hoarding toilet paper.

Changing Perspectives—Overcoming Our Fear-Driven Behaviors

A crisis is a great opportunity to get to know ourselves better.

Some may aspire to great ideals, but when faced with a crisis, they revert to fear-driven behaviors, such as hoarding. It can be helpful to examine how we’re assessing the crisis, in terms of its potential impact both on us and on our communities. It’s also tremendously important to assess our own emotional journeys and thought processes when a crisis arises. We can feel worry, anxiety, and fear during a crisis, and those feelings can be overwhelming. They can drive us to engage in activities that we believe will give us some control over the situation. It takes honest and intense introspection and reflection to understand our feelings, how they drive us to certain behaviors, and how we might redirect those feelings into more constructive behaviors.

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Together. A family learning to get along.

Staying Close while Being Together—How to Keep your Relationships Healthy while Hunkering Down

We’re being advised to stay away from everyone on the planet—everyone except those we live with. We have to spend time with them. We have to spend literally all of our time with them. How can we do this without driving each other nuts?

Living in close quarters in stressful situations is especially challenging. Many of us are faced with new and unfamiliar challenges, such as homeschooling children, working remotely, or making less money. While facing these challenges we are also deprived of many of the outlets for pressure that we have always been able to count on in the past—spending time with friends, going out on the town, or spending the afternoon at a ball game. Spending all of our time in what amounts to a bunker means figuring out how to get along. It means being extremely specific and intentional about what bothers us and how to resolve those irritations without impacting those around us. It means getting to know ourselves in this new reality.

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